Cultivating Long-Distance Friendships as a Missionary
Is it your first or second year in the mission field? It’s easy to say, “I miss home so much!”
I miss the friends I grew up with. I miss my parents. I miss coffee shops at my hometown. I miss my country’s food. There is a lot that we can be missing while we live and serve in a country that is not our own. Personally for me, my transition into my first year as a missionary was smooth but challenging at the same time. During my first weeks, it was an emotional roller coaster, super excited but a little bittersweet about leaving my home country, knowing that I wouldn’t be back for at least a year.
My emotions were a mixture of “I’m so ready to serve!” and “I want to go back”. Even my transition into a new culture was pretty challenging. The local language, communication, different types of local food, adapting to daily life in Hong Kong. I was glad to join the community of YWAM Harbour City, where I had already met most of the staff during my time in Discipleship Training School (DTS). While joining hang outs with new friends from the base and learning about their different cultural backgrounds. Honestly, the warmth and loving community I was becoming part of, reminded me a lot of home.
While being on the mission field for one whole year, I look back on how I was able to continue connecting with my close friends from home. Here are some ways (that have worked for me!) to keep up with your friends and share all the exciting things God has been doing in your life!
4 Ways to Keep Cultivating Healthy Friendships
👉 MAKE TIME FOR CONVERSATIONS
To build stronger friendships, we need to make time for them! We can’t expect our friendships to grow closer when we don’t invest time. We can’t wait for people to initiate all the time – we can also initiate first! Set up a “coffee date” every once in a while, maybe once a month or every two months to catch up! Talk about your day or something funny that happened to you. Talk about what God has been doing in your life. Talk about joyful moments or challenging moments. Share your heart, even when it’s an online video or phone call. It’s not the same as being face to face, but something about hearing your friend’s voice will definitely bring joy to your heart!
👉 IF YOU SEE SOMETHING FUNNY THAT REMINDS YOU OF THEM, SEND IT TO THEM!
Living in the digital world, we often find ourselves online, most of the time connecting through social media. If you see a funny post or meme that reminds you of your close friends, send it to them! Sometimes out of sending a random image to my friend, we’ve had like 2 hour conversations afterwards. Not all communication has to be so formal – sometimes we just need a little break from super deep conversations and we just need a little laughter. It’s fun to remember nostalgic moments together. My friends live all over the globe so I also need to consider time zones, unless I’m super close to the person and they don’t care if I send something to them at 3:00am their time! (haha sorry!)
👉 PRAY FOR EACH OTHER
Find ways to pray for each other! Sending out a quick message: “Friend! I’m praying for you!” and right after, taking a few minutes to lift up your friend in prayer. Prayer is powerful! It connects us to God and we are also able to listen to His voice to receive encouragement for that specific friend. Whether it is a short voice message, video or text message, I think our friends will really appreciate our love and care, no matter how far away you are.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." Philippians 4:6
👉 ENCOURAGE EACH OTHER AS MUCH AS YOU CAN!
Words are powerful. They can lift you up, as well as bring you down. Whether your friend is working full-time, in school or is a stay home mom or dad at home, whatever their situation may be, it’s so amazing that we are able to encourage them! Sending a little note, sending a surprise package (using Amazon), or a video of you sharing about how much you love them, you never know how much of an impact it can be for the other person!
Cultivating healthy long-distance friendships is not easy, it takes time, but it’s so worth it. Having a community around you, walking with you as you serve the Lord is an essential part of being a missionary. Hope these 4 ways of building friendships inspired you to connect with your close friends, even though you are miles and miles away!
